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Worzels World - Revolutionary new security system discovered


Are you sick and tired of constantly having to provide proof of ID? Does the prospect of the invasive insertion of a RFID chip into your body disturb or revolt you? Does the proliferation of surveillance cameras make you feel a little uneasy? Have you ever forgotten to have ready proof at hand that you are who you are and been denied access to your bank account, government services or other such necessaries? 

If the answer is yes to any of these frustrating predicaments, your deliverance may be at hand with the discovery of a radical new approach to personal identification methods. After exhaustive research at the school of life, Emeritus Professor Worzel has, in collaboration with the University of Practical Solutions (UPS) developed a new system with the capacity to revolutionise personal authentication processes and the way we conduct security checks. Imagine not having to prove who you are all the time to anyone and everyone you wish to deal with. I know that I am me and that you are somebody else but how do we convince others that this is so? 

The method, brilliant in its simplicity, is being called ‘getting to know people’ and will, say its supporters, reincorporate a forgotten and mostly ignored human faculty known as ‘personal judgement’. A spokesman for the group says there is evidence that in former civilisations such abilities were developed in human beings and sometimes even in domestic animals. He believes that without too much trouble the effects of human devolution and the dumbing down effects of television, fluoridated water and a sub-standard education system can be sufficiently ameliorated to allow such facilities to be reintegrated into our daily lives. 

This new and novel approach could have many advantages over systems currently in use. Once the skills needed to utilise this system are acquired they cannot be hacked, stolen or destroyed. Systems like card ID’s (photo or otherwise) and even implanted RFID chips must interface with external electronic sensors. Consequently these are capable of being hacked or otherwise externally controlled. Indeed historically what man invents man can also circumvent. However this new ‘personal judgement’ system actually becomes part of the neurological processes of the user and as such cannot be stolen, hijacked, modified or manipulated without the express permission of the owner-operator.

Regarding the marketing of this new system, the professor is not so optimistic as it can be obtained free in terms of financial outlay and because it places control back into the hands of the individual. I suspect it will not be popular with either state agencies or the corporate private sector. It is also likely to be treated with suspicion by millennials who will find such strange concepts foreign to their way of thinking and contrary their victim mentality and the ideology of compliance and dependency which are the pillars of modern education.

Speaking off the record a spokesman for government agencies said that the public sector would not be adopting the new system. 

“It appears to be based on common sense and requires actual human interaction so it is not compatible with current policy or procedures. Implementation of this type of system could easily result in empathy and even friendship developing between state employees and members of the general public. This should be avoided at all costs as it could severely hamper government’s ability to oppress the peasants.”

  Indeed proponents note that along with increasing safety and security, improved levels of personal judgement also provide an effective filter to central and local government propaganda that constantly seeks to convince the public that they are being well served rather than robbed blind. 
It certainly sounds good, but just how reliable could it be? 

“Well, nothing is foolproof except death,” admits Professor Worzel. “Even fools manage that sooner or later. It does however come with the added bonus that it can be fun and socially rewarding. Also when current systems fail – and there are almost unlimited reasons why this could happen and plenty of objective evidence that it is happening – in establishing culpability for failure there is the prospect of long and costly legal battles to effect redress. However under this new ’Personal Judgement System’ any failure is invariably the fault of the operator. Consequently repairs and adjustments are simpler and more straightforward. They can be undertaken by the individual themselves without recourse to costly and often inconvenient external assistance. It is about a forgotten principle that has fallen into disuse lately called taking responsibility. How bad can it be?

 Feedback? Email prof_worzel@hotmail.com

“It appears to be based on common sense and requires actual human interaction so it is not compatible with current policy or procedures.”

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